Writing while watching my UConn boys again! Love this time of year!
I haven’t written in a few days but I have valid excuses…last night I had drinks with a coworker after work and the night before I had a lovely dinner with one of my dearest friends who was in town for a conference (thanks again, M, for a wonderful visit!).
Before I get in to why I didn’t write on Monday, a quick recap on the fitness front: on Monday night, I knew all I really needed to do was yoga (I could have taken a rest day but wanted to move a bit), so when I got home I popped in the Runner’s World Yoga for Runners DVDs that I asked for for Christmas. I started with a 20-minute routine focused solely on core work and then did the usual 40-minute workout (and yes, in retrospect I absolutely should have warmed up with the regular one first, but I hadn’t tried the core one yet and wanted to give it a shot!). They’re both good workouts and there’s still one more to try, “yoga for recovery” – which I imagine is low in movement and focuses on easier poses. We’ll see! Anyway, I’m glad I did both and, considering I ran on Sunday, my legs felt surprisingly relaxed!
Tuesday was a rest day, so nothing big there, and then yesterday I was able to take my favorite HIIT class at my work gym during lunch (normally I go after work but I knew I had plans). The exercises were interesting – this was a different teacher and he had his own style (as they all do), so some of the movements I really liked and some I wasn’t too sure of – but I really feel it in my triceps and back today, so something definitely worked!
Today I made it to my favorite treadmill class, and once again it did not disappoint. We started with a 10-minute block of running (we usually don’t run quite that long) at a 1.0 on incline, adding one level every minute until we got to 10.0 We were supposed to maintain our speed but I did have to drop back around incline level 8 – no shame, I needed the break! At least I kept running! After that we had our more typical surges and recovery breaks and I definitely came out sweaty and gross – the sign of a good workout, even if it doesn’t look good!
So Monday night I started writing a post on comparisons, but I never published it. It just felt a little too dark for me to put out there (to all 3 of my readers, lol). I saved my draft so maybe at some point I’ll publish it, but for now, all I’ll say is that…I’m going through a rough patch. I think it’s a combination of work anxiety and loneliness. I wouldn’t say I’ve been binging…but I have been overeating, especially after a glass of wine. Thankfully I’ve kept up with exercise. That’s usually been my MO – even when my food is out of control, I’ve been able to maintain my exercise, which means a LOT to me and at least makes me feel like I’m accomplishing something. Hopefully tonight I’ll be back on track food-wise and I’m really crossing my fingers I keep it together this weekend.
The work stuff is two-fold – my big batch of travel starts next week and it’s just a lot of logistics to have in order, like making sure my hotels and flights are all set, making sure any presentations are done, and even just making sure I have all of my outfits picked out, as silly as that sounds. Thankfully I have at least one day between each trip, so I’ll be able to keep each trip segmented, but it’s just a lot to keep in mind.
The other half is feeling stuck. I had my annual review today and reminded my supervisor that I’ve been in my role for 4 years with no promotion – it’s getting really frustrating. I was pleased, though, that this afternoon when I got back from the gym, he had a bunch of ideas for ways to at least expose me to different elements of my department, and already I have a new trip lined up (not till April! I have breathing room!) and I think I’m going to invest in a certification program to make me more marketable. So…staying put for now but definitely with eyes on future opportunities.
The loneliness thing…eh it’s a constant, with some times being harder than others. It’s just so hard because I feel like I’ve worked so hard at upping my fitness game and working on food and I HAVE lost weight but it’s not enough. And I don’t know what will be enough. And it’s just like…god how much longer is this going to take?!
Or maybe this is just it, right, maybe it’s just me from here on out. I don’t know.
Anyway I don’t have the answers and if I think about it too much I just get super worked up, so I’ll just leave it at that. Haha and this wasn’t even the dark post I’d started writing on Monday!
That’s all I’ve got for tonight. Off to eat dinner and get myself to bed pronto – I am super tired!
Happy pre-Friday, friends! And my UConn boys are tied…fingers crossed we pull out the victory!